One way to know if you are in love is if you waste time with the person. Nothing is accomplished, no project finished, no true destination reached, maybe even no meaningful information exchanged, but just the same there is joy for having spent time together. Lovers and friends can sit in a field and watch the clouds pass or the sun go down and just enjoy being in each other’s company.
It may just be a personal hang up, but this idea is why I become annoyed (very much so) when I am with someone and they spend their time checking and sending texts with invisible people whether or not we are in the depths of a meaningful conversation. A ten hour car ride is one thing, the period of time while awaiting your turn at a board game is another. Perhaps I am greedy, but I am here to spend time with you, not with a board game, and I want you to waste it with me. If I am not enough, then let’s quit the pretense if the game and either do something else, or I’ll grab my book while you decide to engage others. I do not want to be “fit in.”
The idea of wasting time is also a great definition of the prayer of contemplation or adoration; “Wasting time with God” Who deigns to waste time with us. Our entire relationship with God is not one of attacking and subduing the world, or carrying on a conversation while we are also power walking or driving, but having, in this world’s eyes, completely unproductive time just to sit and be with the other. “Be still, and know that I am God,” is so beautiful when we think that we have a God Who will be still and know us.