MONDAY DIARY: ALMOST EXCRUCIATINGLY TRUE STORIES: HAT HAIR vs HAIR HAT

 I don't think that being baldish bothers me but apparently it does.  I've saved a fortune on shampoo and haircuts and there is no need to worry about wearing hats, riding in convertibles or styling.  BUT, apparently at some level it must bother me because I have a reoccurring dream that I comb my hair slightly differently (not that I actually have anything to comb anymore) and discover that I have this lucious head of hair . . . 

The consolation prize is that I became a man who wears hats - both to stay warm in the winter and to guard against the sun in the summer.  Over the years I've accumulated quite a collection of these head toppers - everything from a skull cap to porkpie.

The other day I ended up getting a slouch hat.  It looks something like this:

Loved ones have told me never to wear a hat like this - apparently I am too old and too unhipster.  Still, I tried one out walking the dogs the other day.

We were walking along and one of the dogs went to the bathroom.  So I bent over to retrieve the production and when I stood up the hat slouched across my face.

So there I was with two leashes in one hand and a bag of post-dog treats in the other and a hat over my face.  So I threw my head back and shook it back into place and it FELT LIKE THIS:

That settled it.