I promise, this is the last
installment for names. But unlike last
week, some of this advice actually has application in Catholic etiquette. If you recall, this week involves the
application of the name which you chose.
But first, let us dispense
with the last bit of free advice, from our hostess Mrs Fenner, that has nothing
to do with Catholic specific advice. She
is not a big fan of giving children nicknames.
Monsignor Manners is a big fan of nicknames because as a child he never
got one. To distinguish him from all of
the other “John”s he was the one most often designated to stick with “Johnny,”
and name he abhors, (not for other people – but for himself) while all of the
other guys got cool nicknames. It was
not until high school that I received my first true nickname and it was all
downhill from there. Now I’ve had so
many I can’t remember them all. (Don’t
ask. I won’t tell you.)
Of course Mrs. Fenner
supports the idea of calling one’s child by one of his Christian names, “really,
the sensible thing to do,” but if one must pick a nickname to be very
judicious. “Never call a boy Junior even though he is. It is the worst possible taste.” Others names she prefers we would all pass on
are “Baby, Buzzie, Sister, Buddie, Sonnie, Toots, etc.” If one is going to pick a nickname, pick one
that will grow with the child for “names will be outgrown, but may not be
shaken off.” From a guy who was almost
nicknamed “Kit” by his father, I appreciate that comment.
Now on to more important
things. Some of these are more important
than others. To start, it is often the
practice to name a son after his father.
John Adam Doe may have a son that he names John Adam Doe. The son, as long as his father is alive, may
be called John Adam Doe Jr. (If “junior”
is written out, it is never capitalized.)
The father, save for common speech or for business reasons, is never
referred to as “senior.” “Senior” is
never printed. “It would be better to
say, ‘the senior Mr. Doe’ if one wishes to make the distinction.” The young Mr. Doe loses his “Jr.” title upon
the death of his father for all official purposes.
If, while the senior Mr. Doe
is still alive, Mr. Doe Jr. has a son, the first two Mr. Does do not change
their titles but the youngest Mr. Doe becomes Mr. John Adam Doe III. Upon the death of grandpa, the third becomes
Mr. John Adam Doe Jr.
Now, if instead of the senior
Mr. Doe naming his son after himself he had named him Jeffery Alexander Doe but
Jeff named his son after his Dad, then the son would be named Mr. John Adam Doe
II. Subsequently if another child in the
family is given the same name, say by Jeff’s brother Joseph, he would be Mr.
John Adam Doe III and so forth. If the
sons who are demarcated by numerals in turn have sons to whom they pass on the
name John Adam Doe, they are given the title “Jr.” The numeric Mr. Does lose their numbers at
the death of the common ancestor.
In the United States it is
not our practice to retain our numbers no matter how attached we become to
them. “It is considered affected,”
according to Mrs. Fenner. They are
retained properly in certain circumstances and for the convenience of
reference. John Paul II retains his
numbers for ease of reference to his papal era.
So as far as parish records
are concerned, numbers and “juniors” are not recorded since they are not
permanent parts of one’s name. Families
may be in a parish for many generations so there would be constant crossing
outs and re-designations for such names.
It is far better to have birth dates when trying to trace a family name
in parish records. Simply saying, “No! I want the John Adam Doe Jr.” may not be
helpful save for the very savvy secretary who has no way of knowing who is and
who is not numbered.
Go here to generate your child's pirate name for life.
Next week – guests, robes,
and pictures.
5 comments:
fie on nicknames
I did not know this. I'm afraid I've perpetuated "affectation" by making the number (4 or IV) a part of my first-born's name, when he should be Jr. as neither grandfather or grandfather are among us today. But I suspect I've negated much of the affectative effect by bestowing "Man-man" upon him as a nickname. While that might take care of the affectation aspect of it, I am 0 for 2 in Mrs. Fenner's book.
My daughter's nickname is Dinky. She loves it.
In my classes over the past few years, I have encountered Alexes, MacKenzies, and Madison's. All girls. Go figure!
Ahhhh . . . unisex names. Somehow I don't think that fathers are going to be happy naming their boys "Madison" or even "Alex" anymore.
What is interesting to me is that the girls are being given MALE names. (Is that "radical feminism"?)
We can't recognize the differences between the sexes (notice that I didn't say "genders") by saying
"actor" vs. "actress" etc. Meryl Streep is an "actor." Maybe Johnny Depp wouldn't mind being called an "actress" but I'll bet Russell Crowe WOULD mind.
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