THINGS COULD BE WORSE, YOU COULD HAVE HIS JOB

Saturday night I was driving in an unfamiliar part of town with all of the priests from this parish. The road we would normally be taking was closed because of a water main break and we were circling around trying to get back to the parish. As we approached a main intersection a police car was coming straight at us flashing its lights and blaring its sirens. It blocked the street off across from us, which was fine because we were turning anyway. With the prodding from the other priests to, “Just go ahead,” we continued on only to be honked at by the police car.

The reason became somewhat apparent as soon as we turned the corner. There were police cars all over the place and the road was shut down. A normally busy road, it was empty of all cars as though we had stumbled onto a parade route, except that it was dark and there was no parade.

There was not a lot of time to decide between pulling over or finding a quick way off the street as just then a pickup truck came careening around the corner in a dangerous manner followed by police car after police car. One of the other priests mentioned after that they didn’t know the city had so many police cars.

Before I could register what was going on the pastor said, “We’re in the middle of a car chase!” It was actually quite thrilling although Sunday there was a big fat NOTHING about it in the newspaper.

How easily it would have been for the truck veering around that corner with its tires squealing to lose control. Had the street been wet or had the truck had bald tires or if he had simply been going more quickly we could have ended up on “Worlds Greatest Car Chase Crashes,” as we would have been right on his flight plan. Perhaps guardian angels were working over time. With the diocese facing a priest shortage as it is, this would have been a headache Sunday morning for somebody as we are taking care of not only the mass schedule here, but also helping out at a neighboring parish and a local convent. Thank you guardian angels.

I am not at all kidding when I say I put full stock in the idea of Guardian Angels. I’ve been pulled out of too many scraps (like pulling into the middle of a car chase) to not have caught a glimpse of a wing or halo here or there.

Here’s just one more story (are you reading M.O.?) I never claimed to be particularly bright and the following story may confirm that notion in your mind. One fall night out at the farm a few of us priests had gathered for a bon-fire. Late into the night there were only two of us left with a sizable fire still roaring when - DO NOT TRY THIS – the other priest said, “Ya know, when I was in the Boy Scouts, we used to put a bottle of water in the fire and it would squirt like a geyser.” I will spare you most of the details, suffice to say a) it didn’t work, and b) we progressed to the point of putting a bottle in the fire with the lid on. It started making funny noises (and not “ha ha” funny either) and one of us had the place of mind to say, “I think we should go stand behind the tree,” which we did.

We stood there for a few minutes while the “not ha ha” funny noise continued and I finally said, “I’m just going to go over there and knock the bottle out of the fire.” Right then there was an explosion. Not a nice, tiny, polite explosion, but the kind that brings people out because they think there has been a terrorist attack. The fire was blown out, large logs were flung out from the epicenter, and there was a little crater where the bottle had been. There was a beautiful aspect to it. All around for quite a large circumference there were tiny red coals that seemed to mimic the stars in the clear night sky. We felt like giants walking amid galaxies.

We started to laugh uncontrollably. That is, until we realized we could have died and gave up a prayer of thanks to our guardian angels for leaving us completely unscathed and much wiser.

Don’t forget that your guardian angel is there and ready to help you, and equally so, to remember to say thanks now and then. And be honest – you have a guardian angel story too don’t you . . .