GUEST BLOGGER - A SPECIAL INVITATION

Today's blog is written by Mr. David Stavarz, seminarian for the Diocese of Cleveland.

We, as human beings, oftentimes make things more complicated than they need to be. I would actually say that, in general, we tend to make the whole of life more complicated and busy than it needs to be. A good portion of our younger years is filled with schooling - of studying, test taking, and paper writing. After graduation, our lives are filled with schedules, meetings, and long work hours. Careers in business, marketing, politics, the medical field, engineering, and the like require refined skills and immense learning and seem very complex to those not within those particular fields. In today’s technological age, our heads are filled with news of events that happen all around the globe and to be a good citizen we can sometimes think we need to constantly know what is going on in the world. Sometimes, doesn’t it seem like life should be more simple?

When it comes to religion, Catholicism is a faith that can seem especially complicated. In Catholicism there are loads to teachings, doctrines, documents, heresies, councils, popes, saints and so on that can seem to make living the Faith a very involved and complicated reality. But does living a good Catholic life really mean knowing all the little Catholic details?

It is certainly important that we know the Faith and know the Faith as best we can. Growing in our understanding of Catholicism can truly transform our lives. But the standard of living a good Catholic life isn’t just knowing every theological detail and being able to articulate the complexity of the Faith at any time. Living the Catholic faith, in today’s world especially, is and can be much simpler than we sometimes make it.

So what is essential to living a good and simple Catholic life? What can simply ground our faith to make it not just a complicated list of things to do and know? 

What makes our faith powerful and simple is a living relationship with Jesus Christ. That’s it. When we truly realize this relationship in our lives it breathes life into our every action and becomes the reason for our existence. Relationship is what helps us to live a good Catholic life. St. Therese of Lisieux knew this good life lived in relationship as “The Little Way”. She knew that a simple faith was best lived out in love, mercy, and devotion to Jesus in small ways everyday.

One of the greatest and generally lesser known ways we can come into a closer relationship with Jesus is by strengthening our relationship with Mary, His mother. In the Scriptures we do not hear much from Mary, but what we do hear from her is profound and forms the core of what our faith life should look like - namely, trust, self-gift, and mercy. Mary is one of the single most important persons in the Church behind Jesus not because of how she made faith more complicated, but through her example of how to live a powerfully, simple faith.

Fr. Michael Gaitley is a nationally recognized Catholic priest and writer who knows very well the importance of having Mary guide us to leading a simple life devoted to Christ. Fr. Gaitley also believes that having a relationship with Mary will lead us to encounter Jesus especially as He is the source of Divine Mercy. Mercy is what living a simple, yet powerful, faith looks like.

From June 23-25th Fr. Gaitley will be leading a retreat at Walsh University on Mary and Mercy. Throughout this weekend retreat, Father will help show just what a simple and devoted relationship of faith and mercy looks like, particularly through the example and intercession of Mary and other saints such as Therese of Lisieux, Maximillian Kolbe, and John Paul II. 

Fr. Gaitley wants you to see that the time is now for you to live a simple and real faith that is full of love and mercy. Maybe it’s time to strengthen your faith by making it a little less complicated and more about a simple and living relationship with Jesus, the Divine Mercy. If you want to grow closer to Jesus and Mary in your faith life please consider this retreat. This retreat could change your life forever. It could lead you to a life of faith that is simple, powerful, and renewed. 

MONDAY DIARY: ALMOST EXCRUSIATINGLY TRUE STORIES: WHY PENMENSHIP SHOULD STILL BE TAUGHT IN SCHOOLS

When I was ordained my cousin handed me a cookbook and said, "You are now a public figure.  The only place where you will not have people telling what to do is in the bathroom and in the kitchen.  Learn to cook."  She was wrong.  There are people in the kitchen with ready ideas on how to cook whatever it is you are cooking.

 

So it is true, being a priest makes you a public figure and as such you must make certain accommodations to the people with whom you come in contact.  Sacrifices must be made.  It's the nature of the style of life.  For example, there are two types of people in the world: huggers and non-huggers.  I'm a non-hugger.  Huggers LOVE non-huggers.  It is like my dog.  He will find the one person in the group that does not care for dogs and try to prove to him that he is lovable.  Such is a hugger.

So there you go.  Over the years you grow accustomed but if I can avoid anything past the manly (with either sex) quick hug and two slaps on the back, I do. 

 

This past weekend I went with our youth to the Franciscan University of Steubenville's Youth Conference; 2000 very excited Catholic youth with all of the enthusiasm and desire to express their faith that comes with that. 

 

Mostly for the adults I think, they have emergency coffee stations in the morning.  Bleary eyed adults lumber out of the dorms like bears awaking from 6 months of hibernation (except in this case it is due to a distinct LACK of sleep) to make their way to the emergency coffee station to fill up on caffeine in order to make it through the rest of the day. 

 

But the coffee comes in Styrofoam cups, a thing I distinctly dislike.  Coffee is too important.  It is meant to be enjoyed and that includes the container from which it is drunk.  (Is "drunk" correct?)  Would you keep your diamond necklace in a shoe box?  No.  If the pope came to visit would you drive him around in a beat up late model pick up truck?  (Well, now that I think of it, this pope might like that.)  Just so, coffee should be drunk from a mug.

 

So I saw this sign written in typical teenage bubble letters.

Here's the problem with bubble letters.  They are open to interpretation.  For example, the "H" in this case could be easily mistaken for an "M" which, of course, I did.  Having a Styrofoam cup of coffee in my hands, this took place before I realized the mistake I was making:

MONDAY DIARY: ALMOST EXCRUSIATINGLY TRUE STORIES: ATTACK OF THE KILLER STICK EMS.

So as you may remember I was leaving last week to give a retreat to our third year seminarians (which for me was a lot of fun and I believe that none of them will need much therapy in the future for my efforts)  It was out in the middle of nowhere and whereas I had better phone reception there than I do in the rectory, there was no computer hook up and so I could not keep up with the blog.  (Also not a bad thing - that helped keep me focused.)

 

It is part of my general strategy to have my desk cleaned off before I go.  I get that from my mother who had to have the house spotless before we went on vacation.  If I get it all cleaned off, so the theory goes, then it won't be so horrible when I return. 

Or so I thought.  But there was one little post it note that I missed that was partially hidden from sight hanging over the side of the in box as it was.  Here is a still close up taken from the security cameras that you might have missed above.

Like kittens or puppies they look so cute and innocent at this stage.  But then like bed bugs they start multiplying.

It isn't enough.  They are like the demons from Mathew 12:45, "Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that man is worse than the first. That is how it will be with this wicked generation."

But the stick ems are only the beginning of the problem.  The mail moves in like the mafia and starts organizing the malefactors.

Soon they have transformed themselves into a hideous monster wreaking havoc and terror in the office.

There is not to be done.  No rest for the wicked.  No time to relax and get used to being home.  The monster must be vanquished.  And it can only be won one blade of post ems at a time.

But it can be done.  It may take some time, some aspirin, and a refusal to be nice and chit chatty with people, but the enemy must be defeated before he becomes so large that he becomes unstoppable.

Yes. 

 

Done.

 

Or so you think. 

 

What is that blue glow behind you? 

 

 No! 

 

 Don't turn around. 

 

Run! 

 

 

Run like the dickens.

 

And don't look back! 

MONDAY DIARY: REVERESE RETREAT

Greetings,

Usually about this time I pack my bags and head out to New York State to go on retreat at Trinity Retreat House in Larchmont.  It is a beautiful retreat house for priests right on the sound.  An old mansion donated to the diocese, one sits in the old living room on nice couches and can stare out the large windows and see the salt water which is only a few yards away from the house reflecting the sun like fish made out of diamonds darting here and there.

 

That is also one of its problems.  It seems that the last hurricane that made it through there did some pretty bad damage to the old place and so it is off line for a little spell.  But God is serendipitous and as it turns out I was asked (second string) to give a retreat to some of our seminarians this very week.  There are only three seminarians in the particular class that will be at my retreat (so I can't mess up the diocese too badly) and we won't be in New York, just a retreat house in diocese provided by the Notre Dame sisters.

 

When I go on retreat I have kept up the blog in the past, but I don't know if that will be the case this week.  So perhaps you will hear from me or maybe not until next.  In either event, please keep me, the seminarians, (and Sebastian who will be lonely without me) in your prayers this week.  It would be greatly appreciated.

 

Fr. V

MONDAY DIARY: IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU AND I HAD TO STAY HOME AND HELP PA WITH THE FARM

This past week I was on retreat. Just as I was getting ready to leave New York (where I was on retreat) was hit by a terrible snow storm. Driving was hazardous – the snow was coming down so hard I could not see very far and braking was at best difficult. So that added two hours to the trip home which meant I didn’t make it home for confessions or to see the staff before they knocked off for the day. (In fact I almost called my parochial vicar to say that I was just going to stay in New York for another day until the storm blew over. It would have been the wise thing to do.) That being the case the house was pretty quiet when I got home – much preferred to the kasseri that it usually is. The usual conversation is, “Oh! Welcome home! How was the retreat? I know you just walked in the door but . . .” A drawback of living in a house where you work. As it was there was just Sebastian there to greet me, wagging his tail and crying and saying, “I know you just got home but . . . I really need to go for a walk.”

This retreat was pretty special. The other priests that were supposed to be there had to cancel and so I had the house and the retreat master to myself. The town was still pretty bustling though, unusual in winter, but so close to the holidays that nobody had taken off yet. So as I went on a daily constitutional I would walk around and when passing someone would say, “Hello,” and at best the other would glance up and give a flash of smile – you could miss it if you blinked – and then return to the downcast, serious look.

At first I was a little offended by this. When my family came in from Slovenija to visit Ohio they would ask, “Why is everyone smiling and saying hello to us?” I would respond, “That’s just the Midwest.” I’m rather proud to live in a place like that I would admit.

A digression: I was traveling in Zimbabwe and as we drove through the poorest of the poor stretches of the country people would stop whatever it was they were doing, stand, wave, and smile at our van. When we headed back into the city, particularly Harare, we would still be waving and smiling and the city wise people would stare at us suspiciously.

It occurs to me that one of the best lessons that I learned on this retreat (and there were many wonderful things) was that I was a stranger in somebody else’s territory. I was judging a New Yorker by Ohio standards and was feeling rather condemnatory. It was not that there wasn’t pleasant, faith filled people there, it was that they did not snap to attention, smile, and offer a, “Good morning to you too,” when I thought they should. Hence one of my favorite quotes, “More offense is brought into the world by people taking it than by it actually being offered.”

This is a lesson I need to learn over and over and over: It is not about how I want other people to act, it is about the person that I am supposed to be. (In this particular place perhaps I was the rude one breaking in on other's solitary walks.) I can preach that – but boy is hard to live it.

MONDAY DIARY: RETREAT!

Greetings! I am on retreat this week and so posts may be late or sporatic! Sorry for the inconvenience. Say prayer for me as I say one for all of Adam's Ale readers. (I'll light a candle for you too!)

I’m on the road today. After the last Mass on Sunday, the last walk of Sebastian (at this point he started to suspect something,) and before evaporating out the door going over notes with my ever vigilant parochial vicar, I slipped in behind the wheel of my car, set the GPS, (I’m beginning the slippery slope toward high tech dependence saint preserve me) and stepped on the gas pedal to my yearly retreat. It was time to go. I was starting to get snarky and was taking things too personally. These being major signs that it was time for this priest to charge his spiritual batteries and reboot.

This is the first time that I am going to the retreat house on my own. I usually buddy up with at least one other priest but schedules were so conflicted and convoluted this year it was easiest just to make the seven hour trip on my own. A whole program of entertainment was in place to keep me interested in driving. The first hour was listening to “Wait, Wait! Don’t Tell Me” an NPR news quiz. When the signal was lost there were various CDs (and my rosary) to keep my company. There was a book on tape – a book that I read about ten years ago and enjoyed thoroughly and now was listening to again on CD, “Pillars of the Earth.” There was also “Nick Danger, Third Eye” which I can recite line for line. “What’s all this brouhaha? Brouhaha? Ha ha ha!”

The rest of the time was taken from CDs more in keeping with the purpose of my trip. One was entitled, “The Year of the Priest.” I listened to it with what I’ll admit was a bit of embarrassment. It went on at length about the great sacrifices priests make. And we do. But . . .

Now, there is no denying that there are priests who make extraordinary sacrifices: leaving family behind, working in terrible conditions, suffering poverty, way overworked, being accused unjustly of all sorts of things, and in some parts of the world facing severe opposition and almost monthly a priest meets with martyrdom. But you know what? If you are called to the priesthood, it is a far grander sacrifice not to be ordained. I have met these men in the confessional. They did what they were “supposed” to do – pressured by family or peers to do what everyone else was doing – wife, kids, job - and now quietly sacrificing something within themselves in order to fulfill the life they vowed to live.

Everybody makes sacrifices. You cannot begin to build anything until you sacrifice something. One must say no to many things in order to start creating something great out of the idea you are willing to say yes to. The sacrifices I make in order to be a priest I gladly do. My priest friends and I, when we get together, talk about how fortunate we are and are in wonder that more men do not choose this life. We know the sacrifices that others make and are in wonder at them. At the breakfast shop on our day away we see a mother and father struggling with a young child in the throes of a tantrum or a young couple obviously in a fight with their arms crossed, or we perhaps we’ve talked with family who may have to pull their children from the school because of a monetary set back and think we are lucky for the life we are privileged to live. “How do they do that?” Yet we also know that if that is the life to which God is calling them, anything else would seem a trial.

The escapism book that I am reading told a story about an honor that the main character is receiving. (I hesitate to recommend this book before I finish though I am quite enjoying it. It happened once that I recommended a book when half way through that was just delightful but turned rather lurid to the point that I was embarrassed even to have it on my bookshelf!) When the character was told of his honor it was so well written that I felt his thrill. I started to wonder what honor I could receive that would give me the same thrill. To be quite honest I can’t think of anything that would be more of an honor than of being the pastor of my parish. Become bishop? No. Win an award? No.

The richest man in the world is the one who is happy with what he has. Sure there are things I would like to change (one of which is wishing the Sebastian was on this trip with me.) But they are minor in comparison to the benefits that being a priest is to me.

Sometimes I worry about the future. Will there be a day that I am sorry that I do not have (grand)children? Will I feel loss for not having a family and a home? I was told to expect that when I turned 40 (and am well past that now.) But I realize there has not been a day that I have regretted (maybe a couple of incidents however) and that I am happy today and there is no reason to suspect that I will be unhappy, at least overall, tomorrow.

I hope you have said yes to something. I pray that your yes is bringing you closer to God and joy. But to those of you who are really facing sacrifices whether you be a priest, a married person, a deacon, a religious, or a single person, thank you. Thank you for saying yes and doing your best to build something greater than yourself for the benefit of your brothers and sisters and for the glory of God.

MONDAY DIARY: SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A VOCATION?

Welcome back reader!

Ah . . . retreat was great. This particular retreat is for priests only given by Fr. Benedict Groeschel at Trinity Retreat in New York. A typical day includes about four conferences, Liturgy of the Hours, Mass, Holy Hour, and a fellowship hour.

Of course there was the afternoon break which afforded time for a long walk. Fr. B and I usually headed out toward the business district where Saint Augustine Parish is located. There we would go in to talk things over with Jesus for a little spell and light a candle. I love this little ritual/devotion and feel sorry for Catholics where lighting candles is not an option for those who get some spiritual benefit from it. I was disappointed however to see that they had replaced some of the candle racks with light bulb racks. If you put in a quarter, complicated circuitry would switch on a small light bulb disguised as a candle for some unspecified amount of time. (There is something terribly tidy and practical about this so I passed these by and went to the dirty and high maintenance candles by the sanctuary.)

Apropos of nothing, on one of the walks I took this picture. Just thought it was neat and so share it with you.

Anyway, one of my goals on this retreat was to concentrate on how God is changing my ministry now that I have been named an administrator. One evening after dinner Fr. Groeschel made himself available for private conferences and confession. During my time with him I asked him for any advice he might have for a new administrator.

He admitted that he has never been a pastor. “What a beautiful word: Pastor.” (This was not the time to interupted and clarify that I am an administrator.) Pastor is a beautiful word. Ultimately it is a relationship: a specific relationship. It is a relationship with a very particular group of people known as a parish, it a relationship with a bishop whose representative you are, there is a unique relationship with the greater Church and people in general. He called it being a gatekeeper. The example was given that in New York people do not stop someone on the street and ask them anything, but there are certain gatekeepers which you can with some amount of comfort. Priests and religious who wear identifiable garb are examples of these. Given a random group of people on a busy street corner priests and religious, for a great number of people, are the “go to” people with whom a stranger can feel comfortable. At least I’ve found that true in my life. And finally there is the special relationship that you have with Christ in whom you act as Persona Christi.

All this being said, C. K. asked me just before I left on retreat to post all the reasons to became a priest. There are so many answers one can give from the sublime, to the practical, to the silly. But on this retreat I think I narrowed it down to only one: Is this the life to which you are called? Is God calling you into this particular relationship with Him and His people?

I have shared with you before the sadness of the stories I have heard over the years. Men especially who said they should have never married and how they wish they would have taken their call to the priesthood more seriously. (The converse is also true.) I cringe when I hear of a parent who tries discourage their son or daughter from the priestly or religious life. What if that is what they are called to? Despite the intention a parent might have to save their child from something that they do not value, they may be setting them up for a life of discontent. And a vocational discontentment effects not only the person, but all those who surround the person: those nearest and dearest.

So, the best reason to become a priest? Because you are called to it. I know I would not change it for the world. I wonder if I have grown to love it so or if my disposition and joy are geared toward it. That is hard to tell. But forced to start all over again, I have no doubt but that I would make the same decision if the Church would have me again, for anything else would always be second choice for me.

CHARGE! RETREAT!

I'm always telling people to go on retreat or to find a good spiritual director. But I know finding a good retreat or to discovering a good spiritual director is easier said than done. I almost would rather not go on a retreat than attend one that makes me angry or feels like a complete waste of time. I don't need counseling for my inner child or art class, I need to be challenged and enlightened in my faith.

That is why I like going to Trinity retreat house so much. Unfortunately it is for priests only or I would recommend you all going there. It is run by the Diocese of New York and has a couple of outstanding priests as retreat masters; Fr. Gene Fulton and the inestimable Fr. Benedict Groeschel, CFR. These retreats are nectar for the soul and recharge me for my ministry.

This is Trinity Retreat Center.

From the road it is a somewhat unassuming place. There is no great sign or tar parking lot. In this quiet spot each morning I would wake up and pray the Office of Readings before starting the retreat day.

They day began with meeting all of the other priests in the refectory for breakfast. Soon the last of the coffee is finished and the dishes taken away and we head for the chapel for Morning Prayer and the first conference.

After the conference there is a short break. Sometimes I would write, work on homilies, take photos or just walk about.

Mass comes next. We would meet in the room you see below and vest. I was chosen as choir master and so would pick a song and we would sing and head in to the chapel through the door to the right of the fireplace. It is a very modest but serviceable chapel. The youngest person according to ordination is celebrant for the mass working up the ladder each day (I never seem to make the cut) though Fr. Groeschell or Fr. Fulton would give the homily, which was the length of another conference.

Lunch came next naturally. Afterwords Fr. B. and I would pray Daytime Prayer and then take a constitutional around town, walking for several miles, stopping at St. Augustin Church to pray and light candles and then heading off to the business district to have a cup of coffee and exchange thoughts on what had been talked about that day. Others stayed about the house and read as you see below. Contrary to popular belief, this is not Fr. Schnippel.

Though I always had great intentions, I always seemed to fall into napsio divina after the long walk. But upon coming out of my deep closed-eyes-prayer I'd take up reading. Among other things I finally got around to reading Pope Benedict's Spe Salvi. Fr. Benedict said, "Wear good shoes. It's a long walk through that document." And it was. But it was worth it. Wow.

Below is a view of the sound from out my window. About ten swans seemed to meet there every morning to decide where they were going to be stationed that day I guess.

All gathered in the chapel again for Evening Prayer and another conference as smells of dinner drifted into the chapel from the refectory. It is always enjoyable discussing priesthood with priests from other dioceses. New ideas are uncovered and of course ecclesial gossip is shared.

Below is the bridge that crosses the sound leading to Trinity.

This guy was at the edge of the bridge - a show off begging to have his picture taken.

The hour or so after dinner was always an opportunity to go to confession or have a private meeting with Fr. Benedict or continue your prayers or reading. Below is one of the nearby parks that one could walk to on a constitutional to think and pray.

Then there was Holy Hour at which we would also pray Night Prayer and have another conference. The celebrant for Holy Hour is generally someone who does not get to be celebrant for mass and for this I qualified. It was a great honor - and being that I am not allowed to use incense at St. Clare anymore it was a pleasure that it was de rigour here.

Below are the offices, bookstore, and Fr. Groeschell's room in an outbuilding on the grounds.

After the singing of the Salve Regina we retired to the refectory one last time to talk about the day over wine and cheese. It was in this setting that I snapped this candid shot of Fr. Benedict.

Each year I make sure that we always take at least one turn around this house. I wish I could run into the people who own it and they volunteer to give me a tour. It is quite an magical building and ignites the imagination. Here is one of my favorite details located just off of the courtyard. It is a carolon. Notice there are almost two full octaves of bells. I hope they play them from time to time!This if Fr. B and I down by the sound. I must admit that we did not socialize too much at night during the wine and cheese sessions. Instead we engaged in a bloody, knock down, drag out, life and death game of Scrabble.

It was funny, but at the end of the day it did not seem I could get done all that I intended to do. The day was more packed than the schedule seems to indicate. But I came back refreshed and eager to share the insights that were given to me by these holy men, in particular Fr. Groeschell. What did we hear and pray about? Oh, if you read this blog or come to my masses you'll absorb much of what I did.

I encourage you if you are a priest to go on retreat! It's not about you, it's about the people you serve. Encourage your priests to be loyal to their retreats. As it is imperative that our teachers who take care of our kids take refresher courses, as medical personnel who take care of our bodies need to keep updating their knowledge, as even boiler workers must take classes from time to time to keep their licenses, so priests, who are charged with caring for souls, need to do have their own batteries charged!