Part of the problem of telling people how to die is that
they don’t want to talk about it until it is painfully obvious that they or
someone with whom they are close are about to.
But it is handy information to have in your hip pocket. Nobody likes to take up research on the topic
when death is a few heart beats away.
Here is one of the most important things you should know:
Imminent death is not a prerequisite for the sacrament of anointing
of the sick.
Imminent death is not a prerequisite for the sacrament of anointing
of the sick.
Imminent death is not a prerequisite for the sacrament of
anointing of the sick.
(I heard on the radio yesterday that if you say something
three times people are more likely to hear and remember it.)
I have this image in my head of certain personages,
otherwise holy, intelligent, good people standing next to a hospital bed with a
stop watch and counting down the seconds.
“…three, …two…ONE! We are down to
two hours of life for Aunt Maybell! Call
the priest! Call the priest! Tell him to get out here NOW!”
At least that is the way it appears from this end of the telephone
lines. Save for cases of emergency such
as getting hit by a truck, one should not wait until the last seconds to be
anointed. According to the Catechism of
the Catholic Church, anointing is to take place at the onset of the
malady. (This has been true since Trent
though perhaps not in practice.) It may
be repeated if the persons becomes well and then falls into sickness again, if
the condition worsens, or if a long period of times has passed. The condition must be serious however, though
not fatal.
Why this information on a post about manners? Because manners means making things run as
smoothly as possible for everyone involved.
In this age of less priests and more duties for them to do, it is not in
keeping with the best possible manners to unnecessarily cause an
emergency. Further, there is a risk of
the person being denied the sacrament because of the lack of priests and the
small window of time available that may be avilable. Perhaps he is at a diocesan meeting two hours
away and calls are being forwarded to another parish where the priest is
already on another call and won’t be back for a couple of hours. Knowing your sacraments and taking advantage
of them when they are intended as possible is just plain good manners. And of course there are always true
emergencies, we just need not create artificial ones.
Times have changed since Mrs. Lenner wrote her book. In describing how one should be prepared for
an anointing she writes, “the room should be in perfect order, the patient
should be bathed and wearing fresh night clothing. A woman patient’s costume should always be
modest. Near the sickbed there should be
a table covered with a white cloth and holding a crucifix, two lighted blessed
candles, a vessel of holy water, a spoon, a dish with five or more bits of
cotton, and a damask napkin. If the
priest comes bearing the Blessed Sacrament, as he will of the patient is
conscious, he should be met at the door by a person bearing a lighted, blessed
candle and be conducted to the sickroom.”
Though nice, in reality, none of this done today. Here are my recommendations for a modern day
anointing. After determining that a anointing
should take place, if the person is mobile it may done in the church by setting
up an appointment with the priest. If
the person is not mobile, the priest should be called at the earliest convenience
and a mutually agreeable date and time set.
I highly recommend NEVER being absent from your home for such an
appointment because you had a beauty parlour appointment or a bowling
banquet. (Yes, this does happen!) That makes priests, justifiably or not, very grumpy.
It would be nice, if possible, to have the room and person
as presentable as possible. This is for
the comfort of the patient who is incapable of making their place presentable
to visitors. All of the accoutrements about
which Mrs. Fenner spoke are no longer necessary. I do recommend a crucifix being present in
the room in general however since the Church grants an indulgence. #28 from the book of indulgences states that “if
the priest cannot be present, holy mother Church lovingly grants such persons
who are rightly disposed, a plenary indulgence to be obtained in articulo mortis (at the approach of
death) provided they regularly prayed in some way during their lifetime. The use of a crucifix or a cross is
recommended in obtaining this plenary indulgence.”
The priest should be told of the condition of the person
especially if death is not that far away.
There is an apostolic blessing that the priest will give if the
situation is dire. It is desirable that
family, friends, and loved ones, (and as it turns out, often the health care
professionals) be present and pray.
Sacraments are by their nature public prayers. Except for confession and counseling it is
absolutely wrong to excuse yourself for the anointing so that there might be
privacy.
AND FOR THE LOVE OF PETE – TURN OFF THE TELEVISION. It is often the case that the television has
just become background noise for all the people in the house, but it can be
very annoying and, worse yet, distracting during the celebration of the sacrament
since today Buffy and Kent are actually to be reunited after being divorced
three times because Buffy just found out that she is pregnant by the recently
deceased brother of Kent and is tricking him into thinking it is his child
which he has always wanted.
Because of the laws of the United States, it is extremely
important to tell the admissions office of your institution that you are
Catholic. Notification is no longer made
to you parish and no inquiry will be made.
You must declare your religious preferences for the Church to know that you
are in the institution and are desiring of sacraments. The information fairly will no longer
magically notify your parish.
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